People Quotes

Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it.

Anonymous

Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number.

Anonymous

Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.

Anonymous

Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day.

Anonymous

Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.

Anonymous

Never trust someone who takes hours to text you back, but when you hang out with them they check their phone every minute.

Anonymous

My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead.

Anonymous

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It's like Facebook in real life.

Anonymous

I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.

Anonymous

If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline.

Anonymous

When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver.

Anonymous

I don't know how to act my age because I've never been this old before.

Anonymous

If everyone knew what I was thinking, I would get punched in the face a lot.

Anonymous

I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone.

Anonymous

Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other.

Anonymous

That moment when you dip your cookie in milk for too long and it breaks off, then you wonder why bad things happen to good people.

Anonymous