Funny Facebook Quotes and Sayings

I'm going to open a new Facebook account named 'Anonymous' so all the cool quotes will be attributed to me!

I want to change my name on Facebook to "Nobody," so when I see someone posting something stupid I can Like their post and it will say "Nobody likes this."

You don't know something? Google it. You don't know someone? Facebook it. You don't know where something is? MOM!

There are more important things in life than Facebook and Twitter,.. like watching TV, and having a beer.

By the power vested in me by Facebook, I now pronounce you unfriended and restricted. You may now kiss my butt.

I made my Facebook name "Benefits," so when you add me now it says "you're friends with benefits."

There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link.

Relationships these days start by pressing LIKE on her photo.

I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse.

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary.

Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account.

I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status.

Facebook needs three buttons, "Like", "Dislike" and "Stop being stupid."

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.