Famous Funny Quotes

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Famous quotes by famous authors. Great people make great quotes, and these prominent authors have made our list of the best famous quotes of all time.

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

Albert Einstein

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Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Albert Einstein

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.

Albert Einstein

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Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.

Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.

Albert Einstein

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A good speech should be like a woman's skirt: long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.

A good speech should be like a woman's skirt: long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.

Winston Churchill

A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say 'How to Build a Boat.'

Steven Alexander Wright

Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.

Albert Einstein

Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.

Albert Einstein

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The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

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If A is success in life, then A is equal to X plus Y plus Z. Work is X; Y is play; and Z - keeping your mouth shut.

Albert Einstein

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When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

Albert Einstein

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The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.

Albert Einstein

The worst thing I can be is the same as everybody else. I hate that.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy.

There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy. Her heart.

Melanie Griffith

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I'd like to live like a poor man - only with lots of money.

I'd like to live like a poor man - only with lots of money.

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There was a time when people said, 'Jim, if you keep on making faces, your face will freeze like that.' Now they just say, 'Pay him!'

Jim Carey