I hope we're good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It's like Facebook in real life.
The only relationship I have is with my Wi-Fi. We have a connection.
The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say 'How to Build a Boat.'
Steven Alexander Wright
Some of the greatest ideas of all time have come to people during Math class... none of which had anything to do with Math.
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face!
It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten. They're in front of you in the supermarket express lane.
Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number.
Those who snore always fall asleep first.
When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don't answer because I'm eating.
I don't know how to act my age because I've never been this old before.
I look at the moon and it looks really beautiful!.. Then I look at you... and.. I think I'll look at the moon again?!
If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one life vest... I would miss you so much.
Never trust someone who takes hours to text you back, but when you hang out with them they check their phone every minute.
Everyone wants your best! Don't let them take it away from you.
Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face!
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