The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. Anonymous
When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they're not it.
Be kind to people, and if that's too much to ask for then just be weird to people. It's the least you can do. Anonymous
I'm having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by... Anonymous
I end all my sentences with "Just saying.." because ending them with "You bonehead.." would probably be considered offensive. Anonymous
Are you free tomorrow? No, tomorrow I'm still expensive. Anonymous
I love sarcasm. It's like punching people in the face, but with words. Anonymous
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