Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I lost my car chapstick and now my purse chapstick is in my room, and my room chapstick is in my car, and my whole life is just messed up. Anonymous
My kid asked me why a corn field is not full of popcorn after a lightning strike. I don't know either. Anonymous
When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja. Anonymous
Short Quotes
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Facebook: because time isn't going to pass on it's own. Anonymous
Facebook Short Quotes
Life always has it's ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy. Anonymous
Life Quotes
You know you're mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs. Anonymous
You know you're really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves. Anonymous
Short Quotes
I often wonder who Pete is, and why we do things for his sake. Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor. Anonymous
Moments
I'll stop being so lazy when being so lazy stops being so awesome. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes
Unfortunately code brown doesn't mean someone brought chocolate. Anonymous
Short Quotes
Hold on, let me overthink this. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes
Oh Mickey you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey. Hey, Hey Mickey! Face it, you didn't read that, you sang it. Anonymous
I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on T.V. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes TV Quotes
There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado. Anonymous

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