Money Quotes

Home / Money Quotes

Funny quotes about money.

Them: Money doesn't bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad. Anonymous

They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?

They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug? Anonymous

Love Quotes Top 100

Are you free tomorrow? No, tomorrow I'm still expensive. Anonymous

People Quotes Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

I would've never imaged going into a bank wearing a mask and asking the teller for money. Anonymous

The only exercise I've done this month is running... out of money! Anonymous

Exercise Quotes Short Quotes

They say money doesn't solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine. Anonymous

My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. - Anonymous

My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100

I have everything you could possibly ever need in my purse... except for money. Anonymous

When I was small I thought money and fame brought all the happiness in the world. Now that I'm grown up, I know I was right.

When I was small I thought money and fame brought all the happiness in the world. Now that I'm grown up, I know I was right. Anonymous

Happy Quotes Know Quotes Life Quotes

The hardest thing to find in life is happiness.

The hardest thing to find in life is happiness - money is only hard to find because it gets wasted trying to find happiness. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Happy Quotes Life Quotes Top 100

I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!... He's dreaming too.

I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!... He's dreaming too. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Moments Short Quotes Top 100

Due to current economic conditions the light
at the end of the tunnel has been turned off. - Anonymous

Due to current economic conditions the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off. Anonymous

Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time. - Anonymous

Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time. Anonymous

Statements Time Quotes Top 100

Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them? - Anonymous

Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them? Anonymous

Life Quotes Phone Top 100

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account? - Anonymous

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account? Anonymous

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. Benjamin Franklin

Sayings Short Quotes

I wish my wallet came with free refills. - Anonymous

I wish my wallet came with free refills. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100

I'm as single as a one dollar bill, and I don't need any change. Anonymous

I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty.

I looked into my wallet and it was empty, I looked through all my pockets and they were all empty. Then I looked into my heart and I found you, and only then I figured out how rich I was. Anonymous

Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say "I know it's hard, but you'll be okay. Here's a coffee and a million dollars." - Anonymous

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say "I know it's hard, but you'll be okay. Here's a coffee and a million dollars." Anonymous

Know Quotes Life Quotes Top 100

Ladies and gentlemen thank you for flying xyz airlines, we hope you enjoyed your flight as much as we enjoyed taking your money. Please remember to take all your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among crew members. - Anonymous

Ladies and gentlemen thank you for flying xyz airlines, we hope you enjoyed your flight as much as we enjoyed taking your money. Please remember to take all your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among crew members. Anonymous

They say money doesn't bring happiness, but everyone still wants to prove it.

They say money doesn't bring happiness, but everyone still wants to prove it for themselves. Anonymous

Actual meanings of various terms.

Actual meanings of various terms:
TEAM WORK: Having somebody else you can blame it on.
HARDWARE: The part of a computer you can kick when there are software problems.
IMPATIENT: Somebody who is waiting in a hurry.
INFLATION: Paying today's prices with last year's salary.
Anonymous

Stupid Quotes Work Quotes

I'd like to live like a poor man - only with lots of money.

I'd like to live like a poor man - only with lots of money.

Pablo Picasso

Famous Quotes Man Quotes Short Quotes

Displayed 1-24 of 58 quotes.