Read some of the funniest statements that have been made throughout time.
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat. Anonymous
Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. Anonymous
Relationships these days start by pressing LIKE on her photo. Anonymous
Studying means 10% reading and 90% complaining to your friends that you have to study. Anonymous
I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable. Anonymous
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. Anonymous
I wasn't mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I'm mad.. yes, I'm mad! Anonymous
Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday. Anonymous
If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog. Anonymous
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough. Anonymous
Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time. Anonymous
Whenever I clean my closet I take a GPS with me, so I can find my way back. Anonymous
The surest sign that there's intelligent life elsewhere in the universe, is that it has never contacted us. Anonymous
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. Anonymous
There's something missing in my life, I just don't know if it's a puppy, a person, or a slice of pizza. Anonymous
It's really complicated to make something simple, but very simple to make something something complicated. Anonymous
I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing. Anonymous
The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
I don't go crazy, I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time. Anonymous
When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep. Anonymous
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