When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! Anonymous
If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.' Dave Barry
If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.
Retirement is great, you get to be your own boss and tell yourself to do nothing all day. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Woody Allen
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. Anonymous
Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day! Anonymous
My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot. Anonymous
If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. Anonymous
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Anonymous
As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement.
My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. Steven Alexander Wright
My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work. Anonymous
My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. The first slide was my paycheck. Anonymous
You laugh because I'm different........... I laugh cause I just farted! Anonymous
If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer Simpson