Short Funny Quotes

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Easy to read short quotations by famous authors and anonymous.

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see. Anonymous

Stupid Quotes Top 100

Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years. - Anonymous

Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Questions Top 100

I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed.

I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Sayings Top 100

Friends are chocolate chips in the cookie of life!

Friends are chocolate chips in the cookie of life! Anonymous

Friend Quotes Life Quotes Top 100

People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.

People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important. Anonymous

Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes

I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.

I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous

Stupid Quotes Top 100

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Alison Boulter

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Anonymous

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Love Quotes Top 100

I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!

I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying! CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Phone Stupid Quotes Top 100

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature. Dave Barry

Famous Quotes Sayings Top 100

If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? - Anonymous

If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Anonymous

Eat Quotes Questions Top 100

Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number. - Anonymous

Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes People Quotes Top 100

I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.

I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. Anonymous

Sayings Sleep Quotes Top 100

I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!... He's dreaming too.

I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!... He's dreaming too. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Moments Money Quotes Top 100

All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips. - Anonymous

All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Life Quotes Top 100

Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done.

Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done. Anonymous

Know Quotes Never Quotes Sayings

I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.

I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings Top 100

If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. - Anonymous

If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. Anonymous

Happy Quotes People Quotes Top 100

Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. - Anonymous

Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. Anonymous

People Quotes Statements Top 100

Love your enemies. It makes them so damned mad.

Love your enemies. It makes them so damned mad.

P.D. East

Love Quotes Sayings Top 100

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Anonymous

Love Quotes Top 100

Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.

Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. Anonymous

Sayings Top 100

I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. - Anonymous

I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. Anonymous

Know Quotes Stupid Quotes

He who laughs last didn't get it. - Helen Giangregorio

He who laughs last didn't get it.

Helen Giangregorio

Sayings Top 100

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