Short Funny Quotes

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Easy to read short quotations by famous authors and anonymous.

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.
Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100
People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.
People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important. Anonymous
Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes
Did you just fall? No, I was checking if gravity still works. - Anonymous
Did you just fall? No, I was checking if gravity still works. Anonymous
Questions Stupid Quotes Top 100
Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh. - Anonymous
Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Phone Top 100
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying! CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Phone Stupid Quotes Top 100
If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me. - Anonymous
If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Top 100
Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? - Anonymous
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Anonymous
Eat Quotes Questions Top 100
When nothing is going right, go left. - Anonymous
When nothing is going right, go left. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. - Anonymous
Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. Anonymous
People Quotes Statements Top 100
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. - Anonymous
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Top 100
If you're hotter than me, then that means I'm cooler than you.
If you're hotter than me, then that means I'm cooler than you. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes Top 100
My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead. - Anonymous
My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes People Quotes Sayings
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. - Anonymous
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sleep Quotes Top 100
If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. - Anonymous
If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. Anonymous
Sayings Stupid Quotes Think Quotes
My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. - Anonymous
My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. Anonymous
Money Quotes Top 100
Never let your best friends get lonely... keep disturbing them. - Anonymous
Never let your best friends get lonely... keep disturbing them. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Top 100
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. Anonymous
Life Quotes Never Quotes Top 100
If you have crazy friends you have everything you'll ever need. - Anonymous
If you have crazy friends you have everything you'll ever need. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Top 100
I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.
I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. Anonymous
Sayings Sleep Quotes Top 100
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein
Famous Quotes Stupid Quotes Top 100
When the past comes knocking, don't answer. It has nothing new to tell you.
When the past comes knocking, don't answer. It has nothing new to tell you. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation. - Anonymous
Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Life Quotes Top 100
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