Funny Dog Quotes

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Here are some of our best funny quotes and sayings about being with dogs and funny things that dogs do.

What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours?
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself. Anonymous
Animals Funny Tree Quotes
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. - Anonymous
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. Groucho Marx
Friend Quotes Man Quotes Stupid Quotes
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. - Dave Barry
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. Dave Barry
Animals
Never stand between a dog and the fire hydrant.
Never stand between a dog and the fire hydrant.

John Peer

Animals Never Quotes Short Quotes
How does the healthy dog bark? Ruff Ruff.
How does the cold dog bark ? Scarf Scarf.
How does the confused dog bark? Wutf? Wutf?
 Anonymous
Animals Questions
You can trust your dog to guard your house.
You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich. Anonymous
Animals Eat Quotes Never Quotes
If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog.
If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog. Anonymous
Animals Sayings Statements
I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.
I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor. Anonymous
Animals Eat Quotes People Quotes
To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service.
To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service. Anonymous
Animals
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. - Anonymous
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes
How was the dog's day? Ruff. - Anonymous
How was the dog's day? Ruff. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes Top 100
I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog.
I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog. Anonymous
Animals Think Quotes Top 100
It was me, I let the dogs out. - Anonymous
It was me, I let the dogs out. Anonymous
Animals Short Quotes Top 100
Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away. Anonymous
Eat Quotes
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