Wise cracks and funny advise that people have given to others.
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. Anonymous
An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough. Anonymous
If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off? Anonymous
My advice is to never listen to any advice, not even this one. Anonymous
It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it. Sam Levenson
There are so many times I made you angry, upset, irritated and tired. Today I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of continuing. Anonymous
If what you've done is stupid but it works, then it really isn't that stupid at all.
I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure! Anonymous
I don't think inside the box and I don't think outside the box... I don't even know where the box is. Anonymous
Don't mess with me, I know Karate, Judo, Jujitsu, Kung Fu and 20 other dangerous words. Anonymous
If you don't succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried. Anonymous
just once I'd like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal. Anonymous
If it's free, it's advice; if you pay for it, it's counseling; if you can use either one, it's a miracle.
When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver. Anonymous
If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter. Anonymous
I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year. Anonymous
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care? Anonymous
Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on. Anonymous
Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary. Anonymous
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