Wise cracks and funny advise that people have given to others.
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off.Anonymous
An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.Anonymous
If what you've done is stupid but it works, then it really isn't that stupid at all.
If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off?Anonymous
If you don't succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.Anonymous
I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!Anonymous
Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah.Anonymous
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care?Anonymous
It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.Sam Levenson
Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary.Anonymous
How can you make sure you never miss your target? Shoot first, and whatever you hit, call it the target.Anonymous
I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year.Anonymous
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