Funny Phone & Cell Phone Quotes and Sayings

I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones... that's why it's called a "cell" phone.

I'm having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by...

Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.

If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them.

My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work.

I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever.

A relationship without trust is like a cell phone with no service, all you can do is play games.

Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!

How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice?

Got a new phone today, my old one failed the swimming test.

The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!

Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them?

Never trust someone who takes hours to text you back, but when you hang out with them they check their phone every minute.

How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness.

I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable.

Dance like nobody is watching, because they are not, they are all checking their phones.

What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.'

If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline.

Sorry I didn't pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone.

I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!

I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone.

Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter... people the opposite.

Dear phone, if you didn't light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn't have died so quickly!

According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings.

Hmmm this text message is a little too harsh, I'll add LOL at the end.