CoolFunnyQuotes.com Funny Quotes
Original new funny quotes written by our very own writers at CoolFunnyQuotes.com.
I don't need a psychiatrist to prod into my personal life and make me tell them all my secrets, I have my friends for that.
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In grammar class the teacher asks her student: When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'.
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I live my life one weekend at time, for those two days nothing else matters, I am FREE.
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Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals.
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If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?
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When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.
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The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well.
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I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.
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Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find?
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I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house.
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The hardest thing to find in life is happiness - money is only hard to find because it gets wasted trying to find happiness.
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