If you love questions, you will love asking some of these at the next party or next time you see your friends.
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.
Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday?
What is the best thing to do when you have a hole in a boat and water is leaking inside? Make another hole to drain the water.
Did you just fall? No, I was checking if gravity still works.
How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice?
What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where is the pop corn?
Why didn't I use my turn signals? It's nobody's business where I'm going.
Why do they call it beauty sleep when you wake up looking terrible?
Why did Adele cross the road? To say 'Hello' from the other side.
Why can't cats work on the computer? They get too distracted chasing the mouse around.
Your idea is completely terrible... so what time shall we do it?
You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.
Rita Rudner
I wasn't mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I'm mad.. yes, I'm mad!
Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.
What keys can't open locks? Monkeys, donkeys and turkeys.
Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find?
If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?
If a philosopher answers your question, you will no longer understand what you asked in the first place.
What if there was no Google? Good question.. I'll have to Google it.
How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
Teacher: Why are you talking during my lesson? Student: Why are you teaching during my conversation?
Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.
What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jump.
