Time Quotes

I'm multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Most of the time... when you're crying, nobody notices your tears.
Most of the time... when you're worried, nobody feels your pain.
Most of the time... when you're happy, nobody sees your smile.
But when you fart just one time...

Your idea is completely terrible... so what time shall we do it?

I just got off a flight that crossed through five time zones. Does that make me a time traveler?

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.

If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog.

That awkward moment you can't understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times.

A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first.

They say time is the solution to every problem. I've been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already.

Dear LOL, thank you for being there for me all those times I never had something else to say.

I don't go crazy, I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time.

It's almost bed time, so I'll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time.