Cool Funny Quotes | 800+ Amusing Sayings and Quotations

Top Quotes

Top seven quotes from the Top 100 funny quotes.

$Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.$

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you.

Never let your best friends get lonely... keep disturbing them.

Short Best Never

My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I'm still at work.

You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again.

Short Know Love

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You come into the world with nothing, and the purpose of your life is to make something out of nothing.

Henry Louis Mencken

Life Sayings World

Friends are like walls, sometimes you lean on them and sometimes it's good just knowing they're there.

Know Good Friend

Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else?

Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else?

Top 100 Funny Quotes »

Latest Funny Quotes

I could be a morning person.. if morning was sometime around noon.

I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever.

You never realize what you have until it's gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

Life Good Never

Dear auto-correct, that's not what I was trying to say. I'm getting tired of your shirt.

Sit down and let me tell you a story. Once upon a time I was hungry, and that's what happened to all your chocolate.

When someone asks where you see yourself in 5 years... Buddy, I'm just trying to make it to Friday.

Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue.

Short Sayings Never

Lead me not into temptation... Oh who am I kidding, follow me, I know a shortcut.

It's all fun and games until your jeans don't fit any more.

Lazy Rule: Can't reach it, don't need it.

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