Me watching Olympics: Woah! That was outstanding! Announcer: Another devastating mistake.
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend.
I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat.
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough.
Of all my body parts my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day.
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.
I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run.
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
Your mind needs exercise just as much as your body does, that's why I think of jogging every day.
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day.
Today I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym.
Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.
Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.
I enjoy taking long romantic walks, to the fridge.
I didn't mean to gain weight, it just happened by snackcident.
New year resolutions you can actually keep!
Skip more classes in school.
Call in sick at work more.
Go shopping more often.
Eat more unhealthy food like fries and burgers.
Drink more pop cans instead of freshly squeezing healthy fruits.
Do less exercise and watch more TV.
Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!
I might wake up early and do some exercise, or I might win the lotto, the odds are the same.
Do I run? Yes.. Out of time, patients and money.
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we have no clue where he is.
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch.
My brain cells, skin cells and hair cells continue to die, but my fat cells seem to have an eternal life.
I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.
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