I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat.
Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day.
I enjoy taking long romantic walks, to the fridge.
I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run.
Of all my body parts my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day.
Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend.
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.
I might wake up early and do some exercise, or I might win the lotto, the odds are the same.
Today I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym.
Every morning I do 10 sit-ups, to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock.
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch.
Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
Your mind needs exercise just as much as your body does, that's why I think of jogging every day.
Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.
I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough.
My brain cells, skin cells and hair cells continue to die, but my fat cells seem to have an eternal life.
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we have no clue where he is.
I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.
What's best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies.
I get enough exercise just by pushing my luck!
New year resolutions you can actually keep!
Skip more classes in school.
Call in sick at work more.
Go shopping more often.
Eat more unhealthy food like fries and burgers.
Drink more pop cans instead of freshly squeezing healthy fruits.
Do less exercise and watch more TV.
I didn't mean to gain weight, it just happened by snackcident.
What type of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly squats.
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