Funny Exercise and Dieting Quotes

I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat.

Anonymous

Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day.

Anonymous

I enjoy taking long romantic walks, to the fridge.

Anonymous

I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run.

Anonymous

Of all my body parts my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day.

Anonymous

Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!

Anonymous

Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend.

Anonymous

Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

Anonymous

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do.

Anonymous

I might wake up early and do some exercise, or I might win the lotto, the odds are the same.

Anonymous

Today I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym.

Anonymous

Every morning I do 10 sit-ups, to hit the snooze button on my alarm clock.

Anonymous

My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch.

Anonymous

Of course I'm in shape. Round is a shape.

Anonymous

Your mind needs exercise just as much as your body does, that's why I think of jogging every day.

Anonymous

Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

Anonymous

I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough.

Anonymous

My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we have no clue where he is.

Anonymous