Stupid Funny Quotes
A list of senseless quotations that are dumb and extremely amusing. Even the most naive person can say something really funny.
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you. Anonymous
What is the best thing to do when you have a hole in a boat and water is leaking inside? Make another hole to drain the water. Anonymous
The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' Anonymous
Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy. Anonymous
A cop pulled me over and told me "Papers", so I said "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. Anonymous
Did you just fall? No, I was checking if gravity still works. Anonymous
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying! CoolFunnyQuotes.com
An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough. Anonymous
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. Anonymous
If you had to choose between eating tacos every day or being skinny for life would you choose hard or soft tacos? Anonymous
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first. Anonymous
My friend, remember that without stupidity there wouldn't be intelligence, and without ugliness there wouldn't be beauty, so the world needs you after all. Anonymous
If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. Anonymous
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.
I don't mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years. Anonymous
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein
Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is completely stupid. Anonymous
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning. Anonymous
What I do when I see someone pretty is, I stare, I smile then when I get tired I put the mirror down. Anonymous
After a while, I eventually fell in love and there was nobody to pick me up. Anonymous
Displayed 1-24 of 166 quotes.