Funny Quotes About Eating

I followed a diet but it didn't follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

Anonymous

When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don't answer because I'm eating.

Anonymous

I can't sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Anonymous

If you eat in the kitchen, your room is always clean, and you go to sleep at 9 o'clock, it means you don't have Internet!!

Anonymous

Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now that's confusing.

Anonymous

You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I'm scared!

Anonymous

Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.

Anonymous

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Anonymous

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

Anonymous

If I had 10 cookies and you took half, do you know what you would have? That's right, a black eye and a broken hand.

Anonymous

I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing.

Anonymous

In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry!

Anonymous

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and I find is ingredients.

Anonymous

My hobbies include eating and complaining that I've gained too much weight.

Anonymous

If you had to choose between eating tacos every day or being skinny for life would you choose hard or soft tacos?

Anonymous

Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories.

Anonymous

Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food.

Anonymous

If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge?

Anonymous