CoolFunnyQuotes.com Quote

Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories.

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.

I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.

I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed.

In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry!

Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday.

I am too lazy to be lazy.

Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.

The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?'

If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me.