I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing.
Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge. Anonymous
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories. Anonymous
Next week I'm going on a diet, you can buy me jewelry instead of chocolate. Anonymous
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge? Anonymous
It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already. Anonymous
My hobbies include eating and complaining that I've gained too much weight. Anonymous
I didn't mean to gain weight, it just happened by snackcident. Anonymous
My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors. Anonymous
I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don't think being an adult is going to work for me. Anonymous
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller? Anonymous
The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement. Anonymous
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
An adult is a person who no longer grows in height, but instead grows in length and width. Anonymous