Top 100 Funny Quotes
It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already.
Anonymous
Research has shown that laughing for two minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minute jog. So now I'm sitting in the park laughing at all the joggers.
Anonymous
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
Anonymous
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself.
Anonymous
You don't know something? Google it. You don't know someone? Facebook it. You don't know where something is? MOM!
Anonymous
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
Anonymous
Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working.
Anonymous
Displayed 31-45 of 400 quotes.