Top 100 Funny Quotes

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You can't have everything... where would you put it?
You can't have everything... where would you put it? Steven Alexander Wright
Questions Sayings Short Quotes
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. - Anonymous
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. Anonymous
Know Quotes People Quotes Stupid Quotes
Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.
Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia. Anonymous
Drinking Questions Stupid Quotes
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You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself. - Anonymous
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Know Quotes Sayings
There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link. - Anonymous
There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link. Anonymous
Facebook Internet Life Quotes
Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.
Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.
I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.
People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important. Anonymous
Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed. - Anonymous
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else?
Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else? Anonymous
Love Quotes Questions Short Quotes
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying! CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Phone Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I'm like Pacman when I'm at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me. - Anonymous
I'm like Pacman when I'm at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me. Anonymous
Analogies Eat Quotes
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible. - Anonymous
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible. Anonymous
Short Quotes Wise Quotes
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes
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