Stupid Funny Quotes
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.
Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry.Anonymous
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.Anonymous
No, no, I'm listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.Anonymous
If you had to choose between eating tacos every day or being skinny for life would you choose hard or soft tacos?Anonymous
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.Groucho Marx
My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.Anonymous
He grabbed her hand and held it tightly, and she thought, "he loves me!" And he thought, "wow this sidewalk is icy!"Anonymous
Displayed 91-105 of 168 quotes.