The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
More Quotes by Albert Einstein
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.
Don't be stupid, it might make you famous.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
You laugh because I'm different...........
I laugh cause I just farted!
Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them.
When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories...
It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too, and the day before that.
I'd like to live like a poor man - only with lots of money.
The difference between running and walking is a lot more apparent when you have to go to the bathroom.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
Newspaper ad: Hiring clowns, must be serious.
You're born free, then you're taxed to death.
Two fleas are coming out of a bar when one asks the other 'Do we take a dog or do we walk home?'
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.
The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
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