Work Quotes

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Work quotes about management and jobs. Your colleagues and your boss will have a blast reading these.

Research has shown that laughing for two minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minute jog. So now I'm sitting in the park laughing at all the joggers. - Anonymous

Research has shown that laughing for two minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minute jog. So now I'm sitting in the park laughing at all the joggers.

My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work.

My cell phone is acting up, I keep pressing the home button but when I look around, I'm still at work.

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. - Anonymous

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Short Quotes Sayings Money Quotes

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you. - Anonymous

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

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My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. - Anonymous

My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour.

Short Quotes Analogies

I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run. - Anonymous

I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run.

Short Quotes Lazy Quotes Exercise Quotes

Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. - Anonymous

Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job.

If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. - Anonymous

If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook.

Life Quotes Facebook

I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. - Anonymous

I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today.

On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth. - Anonymous

On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth.

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A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

Life Quotes Drinking Beer Quotes

I'm not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing. - Anonymous

I'm not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing.

If Monday had a face... I would punch it. - Anonymous

If Monday had a face... I would punch it.

Short Quotes Sayings

I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays. - Anonymous

I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays.

Short Quotes Lazy Quotes

Finally it's Friday and I can go out. I'm putting the garbage out and I'll be right back. - Anonymous

Finally it's Friday and I can go out. I'm putting the garbage out and I'll be right back.

Stupid Quotes Top 100

When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep. - Anonymous

When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep.

Statements Sleep Quotes

Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job. - Anonymous

Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job.

Sometimes I can't tell if I'm in preschool or school... Oh wait, I'm at work. - Anonymous

Sometimes I can't tell if I'm in preschool or school... Oh wait, I'm at work.

Short Quotes Life Quotes