Work Quotes

When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep.

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn't know how awesome I was going to be today either.

I love my job only when I'm on vacation.

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Finally it's Friday and I can go out. I'm putting the garbage out and I'll be right back.

My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. The first slide was my paycheck.

If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.

I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year.

I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays.

Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job.

Can we start the weekend again? I wasn't ready.

Stop crying, Monday will be over soon.

New year resolutions you can actually keep!
Skip more classes in school.
Call in sick at work more.
Go shopping more often.
Eat more unhealthy food like fries and burgers.
Drink more pop cans instead of freshly squeezing healthy fruits.
Do less exercise and watch more TV.