When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!!
If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job.
There's just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.
When someone asks where you see yourself in 5 years... Buddy, I'm just trying to make it to Friday.
If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer Simpson
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
I love my job only when I'm on vacation.
Actual meanings of various terms:
TEAM WORK: Having somebody else you can blame it on.
HARDWARE: The part of a computer you can kick when there are software problems.
IMPATIENT: Somebody who is waiting in a hurry.
INFLATION: Paying today's prices with last year's salary.
I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y".
If it's the fifth day in a row that you don't feel like working, it means it's finally Friday!
Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day!
My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot.
Sometimes the best part of my job is that my chair swivels.
If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook.
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour.
I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays.
Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday?
Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job.
Don't worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.
Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday.
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