When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!!
If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. Anonymous
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. Groucho Marx
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy. Groucho Marx
If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.' Dave Barry
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. Steven Alexander Wright
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Woody Allen
The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. Anonymous
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year. Anonymous
Hate your job? Join our support group! It’s called EVERYBODY. We meet at the bar.
Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day! Anonymous
My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot. Anonymous
If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. Anonymous
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Anonymous
As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement.