Anonymous Quote

When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!!

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I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays.

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Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday?

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• Top 100

Don't worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

• Work Quotes

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday.

• Life Quotes
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There's just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.

• Short Quotes
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When someone asks where you see yourself in 5 years... Buddy, I'm just trying to make it to Friday.

• Work Quotes

If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer Simpson

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Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

• Never Quotes
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Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work.

• Drinking
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When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.

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I love my job only when I'm on vacation.

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• Sayings

If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'

• Never Quotes
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I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.

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If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.

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Working in a team means spending half your time convincing the others that your idea is better than theirs.

• Time Quotes
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A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

• Beer Quotes
• Drinking
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The best part of going to work is coming back home at the end of the day.

• Sayings
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Actual meanings of various terms:
TEAM WORK: Having somebody else you can blame it on.
HARDWARE: The part of a computer you can kick when there are software problems.
IMPATIENT: Somebody who is waiting in a hurry.
INFLATION: Paying today's prices with last year's salary.

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Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job.

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I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y".

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