The best advise I have for all my teachers during a test is to pass the test out as fast as possible before I forget everything.
Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X.
Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on.
I can't wait for that to never happen.
Always run away from temptations... but slowly, so they can catch up to you.
Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're right.
Have no fear of perfection, you'll never reach it.
I didn't like my beard at first... then it grew on me.
When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it.
Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.
I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.
All generalizations are false, including this one.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
Steven Alexander Wright
Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.
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