The best revenge is massive success.
An apple a day keeps anyone anyway, if you throw it hard enough.
Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care?
If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
Yes officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn't see your car.
If you don't cut the cake in pieces and just eat the whole cake, then you only had one piece.
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah.
If it's free, it's advice; if you pay for it, it's counseling; if you can use either one, it's a miracle.
The best advise I have for all my teachers during a test is to pass the test out as fast as possible before I forget everything.
I'm off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.
People say I act like I don't care. It's not an act.
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible.
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on.
Don't worry about what to wear today, your smile goes with any clothes.
Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize.
A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator.
I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing.
I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you're wrong.
There are so many times I made you angry, upset, irritated and tired. Today I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of continuing.
How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness.
I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again!
