Wise Quotes

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If it's free, it's advice; if you pay for it, it's counseling; if you can use either one, it's a miracle. - Jack Adams

If it's free, it's advice; if you pay for it, it's counseling; if you can use either one, it's a miracle.

Jack Adams

Famous Quotes Life Quotes

Everyone wants your happiness. Don't let them take it!! - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Everyone wants your happiness. Don't let them take it!! CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Happy Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

I can't wait for that to never happen. - Anonymous

I can't wait for that to never happen. Anonymous

Never Quotes Short Quotes

Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. - Anonymous

Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. Anonymous

Never Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

$In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care?$

In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care? Anonymous

Math Quotes Top 100

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. Henny Youngman

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.

Oscar Wilde

Life Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake! - Anonymous

Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake! Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes

I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again! - Anonymous

I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again! Anonymous

Life Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

Good Quotes Happy Quotes Marriage Quotes

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck

Never Quotes Short Quotes

I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you're wrong. - Anonymous

I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you're wrong. Anonymous

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. Dave Barry

Never Quotes Sleep Quotes

A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator. - Anonymous

A few days ago I lost my weapon of Math instruction... my trusty pocket calculator. Anonymous

Don't mess with me, I know Karate, Judo, Jujitsu, Kung Fu and 20 other dangerous words. - Anonymous

Don't mess with me, I know Karate, Judo, Jujitsu, Kung Fu and 20 other dangerous words. Anonymous

Know Quotes Top 100

Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. - Anonymous

Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. Anonymous

Exercise Quotes

My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me." - Anonymous

My taste in music ranges from "You've gotta listen to this" to "I know, please don't judge me." Anonymous

I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong. - Anonymous

I could agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong. Anonymous

People Quotes Short Quotes Statements

If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter. - Anonymous

If you don't like me, remember it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter. Anonymous

Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize. - Anonymous

Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes Top 100

Treat me like a joke and I'll leave you like it's funny. - Anonymous

Treat me like a joke and I'll leave you like it's funny. Anonymous

Love Quotes Short Quotes

Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on. - Anonymous

Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on. Anonymous

It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature. Steven Alexander Wright

The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. - Anonymous

The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings

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