Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
"Revenge" sounds so mean, that's why I prefer to call it "Returning the favor."
In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry!
When someone doesn't like something, it's often because they're not familiar with it, or they're too familiar with it.
Don't be stupid, it might make you famous.
A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.
Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you.
If we ever travel far in the universe to another planet with intelligent life, let's just make patterns in their crops and leave.
I'm glad I don't have to hunt my own food, I don't even know where sandwiches live.
Of course I talk to myself... sometimes I need expert advice.
The chains on my mood swing just snapped. Run!
When a door closes another door should open, but if it doesn't then go in through the window.
When you fall, I will be there to catch you - With love, the floor.
Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.
God heals, and the doctor takes the fees.
You come into the world with nothing, and the purpose of your life is to make something out of nothing.
Your bank account can be overdrawn, but it can never be overfilled.
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
Listen, smile, agree.. Then do whatever you were gonna do anyway.
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself.
They say the best things take time. That's why I'm always late.
Life is always rocky when you're a gem.
Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done.
Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies.
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