Funny Sayings

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Your cake

"Oh you want to have your cake and eat it too?" Darn right, what good is cake if you can't eat it ? Anonymous

Eat Quotes Good Quotes

It's alright if you don't agree with me... I can't force you to be right. - Anonymous

It's alright if you don't agree with me... I can't force you to be right. Anonymous

If you were able to believe in Santa Claus for 8 years, you can believe in yourself for 5 minutes. Anonymous

Stop destroying the Earth, it's where I keep all my stuff. - Anonymous

Stop destroying the Earth, it's where I keep all my stuff. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100 World Quotes

A good mood like is like a balloon, one prick is all it takes to ruin it. - Anonymous

A good mood like is like a balloon, one prick is all it takes to ruin it. Anonymous

The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. - Anonymous

The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Wise Quotes

Your bank account can be overdrawn, but it can never be overfilled. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Your bank account can be overdrawn, but it can never be overfilled. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Money Quotes Never Quotes Short Quotes

Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions.

Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions. Anonymous

You never run out of things that can go wrong. - Edward A. Murphy (Murphy's Law)

You never run out of things that can go wrong.

Edward A. Murphy (Murphy's Law)

Never Quotes Short Quotes

He who wakes up early, yawns all day long.

He who wakes up early, yawns all day long. Anonymous

Short Quotes Statements

If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. - Anonymous

If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. Anonymous

Know Quotes People Quotes Questions

I'm never wrong. Just different levels of right. - Anonymous

I'm never wrong. Just different levels of right. Anonymous

Never Quotes Short Quotes

A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back.

A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

If I'm silent it's because there's thunder inside me. Or I'm just chilling, may the odds be in your favor. - Anonymous

If I'm silent it's because there's thunder inside me. Or I'm just chilling, may the odds be in your favor. Anonymous

If Monday had a face... I would punch it. - Anonymous

If Monday had a face... I would punch it. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. - Anonymous

Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You're glitter glue. Anonymous

Today I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym. - Anonymous

Today I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym. Anonymous

Exercise Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

Asleep first

Those who snore always fall asleep first. Anonymous

People Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes

I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! - Anonymous

I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! Anonymous

I hate it when I turn on the car in the morning and the music starts blasting... It's like, woah, I'm not the same person I was last night. - Anonymous

I hate it when I turn on the car in the morning and the music starts blasting... It's like, woah, I'm not the same person I was last night. Anonymous

Better moment

There is no better moment to postpone something you don't want to do other than right now. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Moments

A misty day does not signify a cloudy day, it signifies frizzy hair.

A misty day does not signify a cloudy day, it signifies frizzy hair. Anonymous

Short Quotes Statements

If at first you don't succeed, order some pizza. - Anonymous

If at first you don't succeed, order some pizza. Anonymous

You call it nagging, I call it 'listen to what I said the first time!' - Anonymous

You call it nagging, I call it 'listen to what I said the first time!' Anonymous

Short Quotes Time Quotes

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