I hate mosquitoes. I mean, I know I am delicious, but I don't give out free samples. Anonymous
The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I actually asked for pizza. Anonymous
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
If a philosopher answers your question, you will no longer understand what you asked in the first place. Anonymous
You can't have everything... where would you put it? Steven Alexander Wright
I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you. Anonymous
Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake! Anonymous
Math: the only place where you have to figure out the ratio of yellow candy to blue candy when all you're thinking about is eating them. Anonymous
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it. Anonymous
I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don't think being an adult is going to work for me. Anonymous
If someone says "Who are you gonna call?" and your instinct is to say "Ghostbusters" then I probably don't want to know you. Anonymous
Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits. Anonymous
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