Funny Sayings
The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
Anonymous
Sleeping is hard in the summer because the blankets are too warm, but without them I am vulnerable to monsters.
Anonymous
It's better to shut up and give the impression that you're stupid than to say something and erase all doubt.
Anonymous
Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.
Albert Einstein
When a door closes another door should open, but if it doesn't then go in through the window.
Anonymous
If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog.
Anonymous
Two mysterious people live in my house. "Somebody" and "Nobody." Somebody did it and nobody knows who.
Anonymous
My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room.
Anonymous
Displayed 97-120 of 245 quotes.