Short Funny Quotes

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Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary. - Anonymous

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary. Anonymous

Facebook Top 100 Wise Quotes

I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.

I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning. Anonymous

Stupid Quotes Top 100

Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. - Anonymous

Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Friend Quotes Top 100

Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. - Anonymous

Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone. Anonymous

People Quotes Top 100

The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!

The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep! Anonymous

Life Quotes Sleep Quotes Time Quotes

If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. - Anonymous

If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front. Anonymous

Happy Quotes People Quotes Top 100

I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. - Anonymous

I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. Anonymous

Know Quotes Stupid Quotes

Facebook needs three buttons, "Like", "Dislike" and "Stop being stupid." - Anonymous

Facebook needs three buttons, "Like", "Dislike" and "Stop being stupid." Anonymous

Facebook Top 100

$For me, math class is like watching a foreign movie without subtitles. - Anonymous$

For me, math class is like watching a foreign movie without subtitles. Anonymous

Analogies Math Quotes

Relationships these days start by pressing LIKE on her photo. - Anonymous

Relationships these days start by pressing LIKE on her photo. Anonymous

Facebook Love Quotes People Quotes

You can stop driving me crazy, I can walk from here. - Anonymous

You can stop driving me crazy, I can walk from here. Anonymous

Sayings Stupid Quotes Top 100

I wonder, we lazy people go to heaven... or do they send someone to pick us up? - Anonymous

I wonder, we lazy people go to heaven... or do they send someone to pick us up? Anonymous

Lazy Quotes People Quotes Questions

Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake! - Anonymous

Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake! Anonymous

Sayings Wise Quotes

My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. - Anonymous

My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Anonymous

Analogies Top 100 Work Quotes

I wish my wallet came with free refills. - Anonymous

I wish my wallet came with free refills. Anonymous

Money Quotes Top 100

I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing.

I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing.

Socrates

Know Quotes Wise Quotes

When the past comes knocking, don't answer. It has nothing new to tell you.

When the past comes knocking, don't answer. It has nothing new to tell you. Anonymous

Sayings Top 100

The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

Walter Bagehot

Life Quotes People Quotes Top 100

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Anonymous

Love Quotes Top 100

My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. - Anonymous

My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Top 100

Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday.

Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Statements

How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice? - Anonymous

How come iPhone chargers are not called apple juice? Anonymous

Phone Questions Top 100

We are going to be best friends forever... besides you already know too much. - Anonymous

We are going to be best friends forever... besides you already know too much. Anonymous

Friend Quotes Know Quotes Top 100

I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again! - Anonymous

I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again! Anonymous

Life Quotes Sleep Quotes Wise Quotes

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