I'm not here to judge, I'm just pointing out all the mistakes you're making.
Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else?
I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.
Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.
Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
The best things in life are free. The rest are too expensive.
Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe.
I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.
A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have.
I wonder, we lazy people go to heaven... or do they send someone to pick us up?
I can't sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.
I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.
Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday.
I have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can't find them.
Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor.
When the past comes knocking, don't answer. It has nothing new to tell you.
Today I was a hero. I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle.
If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible?
All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips.
I love my computer because all my friends live inside it!
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
When you fall, I will be there to catch you - With love, the floor.
A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.
My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour.
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