Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.
This too shall pass... It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.
I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
Simpsons
The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.
Walter Bagehot
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.
Louis Hector Berlioz
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.
William Charles Dement
The best things in life are free. The rest are too expensive.
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.
Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there.
You're born free, then you're taxed to death.
All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.
Art Buchwald
The most fun things in life are either immoral, illegal or they make you fat.
That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another....
A joke is a very serious thing.
I live my life one weekend at time, for those two days nothing else matters, I am FREE.
You come into the world with nothing, and the purpose of your life is to make something out of nothing.
Henry Louis Mencken
In life, we must find happiness. I've been looking everywhere and still haven't found it.
The hardest thing to find in life is happiness - money is only hard to find because it gets wasted trying to find happiness.
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