Anonymous Funny Quotes

Home / Authors / Anonymous / Page 25

A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry! - Anonymous

In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you. In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry!

The only thing you have to fear is fear itself... and spiders.

The only thing you have to fear is fear itself... and spiders.

Our love is like a train with no brakes, unstoppable. - Anonymous

Our love is like a train with no brakes, unstoppable.

If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. - Anonymous

If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them.

I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better. - Anonymous

I know that I am stupid but when I look around me I feel a lot better.

People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.

People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.

I only have one wish in life... For all my dreams to come true. - Anonymous

I only have one wish in life... For all my dreams to come true.

Some days I wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old, and the energy of a 3 year old. - Anonymous

Some days I wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old, and the energy of a 3 year old.

Sayings

I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking. - Anonymous

I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking.

If I'm silent it's because there's thunder inside me. Or I'm just chilling, may the odds be in your favor. - Anonymous

If I'm silent it's because there's thunder inside me. Or I'm just chilling, may the odds be in your favor.

Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.

Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels. - Anonymous

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

Friend Quotes

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Yesterday I really wanted tacos, and now I'm eating tacos. Follow your dreams! - Anonymous

Yesterday I really wanted tacos, and now I'm eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.

Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.

How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness. - Anonymous

How do you make your cell phone smarter? Turn up the brightness.

I didn't find out what happiness means until I got married... and then it was too late. - Anonymous

I didn't find out what happiness means until I got married... and then it was too late.

I'm not feeling very worky today. - Anonymous

I'm not feeling very worky today.

Best friend: the one you can only get mad at for a short period, because you have important stuff to tell them. - Anonymous

Best friend: the one you can only get mad at for a short period, because you have important stuff to tell them.

Friend Quotes

I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough. - Anonymous

I did a push-up today. Well actually I fell down, but I had to use my arms to get back up, so close enough.

Me and my best friend can communicate with just facial expressions. - Anonymous

Me and my best friend can communicate with just facial expressions.

Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it.

Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it.

In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep. - Anonymous

In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep.

I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry! - Anonymous

I don't need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline. - Anonymous

If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline.