Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself.
Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring so I go back to being myself. Anonymous
People Quotes Sayings
Why do you wear glasses? My eyes are so beautiful they have to be kept behind glass, like a showcase. - Anonymous
Why do you wear glasses? My eyes are so beautiful they have to be kept behind glass, like a showcase. Anonymous
Questions
I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. - Anonymous
I'm retired. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today. Anonymous
Short Quotes Work Quotes
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My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. - Anonymous
My windows aren't dirty, my dog is painting. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
What's your best non-swearing insult? I hope you step on a Lego. - Anonymous
What's your best non-swearing insult? I hope you step on a Lego. Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
I love my computer because all my friends live inside it! - Anonymous
I love my computer because all my friends live inside it! Anonymous
Computers Friend Quotes Short Quotes
The most fun things in life are either immoral, illegal or they make you fat.
The most fun things in life are either immoral, illegal or they make you fat. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Never forget those who helped you along the way... Google, Wikipedia and Dictionary. Anonymous
Sleeping on my keyboard. If I answer, I'm talking in my sleep. - Anonymous
Sleeping on my keyboard. If I answer, I'm talking in my sleep. Anonymous
Computers Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
I can't wait for that to never happen. - Anonymous
I can't wait for that to never happen. Anonymous
Never Quotes Short Quotes Wise Quotes
You know what's funny? Lots of things, so lighten up! - Anonymous
You know what's funny? Lots of things, so lighten up! Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge. Anonymous
Drinking Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care?
In Math class we learned more about algebra today, such as X+10=Y should I care? Anonymous
Math Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face! - Anonymous
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face! Anonymous
Life Quotes Love Quotes People Quotes
It's funny how nobody notices all the good things you do until you don't do them. - Anonymous
It's funny how nobody notices all the good things you do until you don't do them. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100 Work Quotes

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