Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks. Anonymous

Money Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes

It was me, I let the dogs out. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off. Anonymous

Short Quotes

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How do you feel when the coffee machine is out coffee? Depresso. Anonymous

Life Quotes Questions Short Quotes

Be bold, be italic, but never regular. Anonymous

Life Quotes Never Quotes Short Quotes

A misty day does not signify a cloudy day, it signifies frizzy hair. Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes Statements

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn't know how awesome I was going to be today either. Anonymous

Work Quotes

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Anonymous

Money Quotes Short Quotes

I'm still trying to figure out how "wash your hands often" translates into "buy all the toilet paper you can find." Anonymous

That awkward moment when it's quiet in class and your stomach decides to sound make whale mating sounds. Anonymous

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Short Quotes

Why shouldn't you ever iron a four leaf clover? You don't want to press your luck. Anonymous

Questions

Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my word. Anonymous

Short Quotes

Covid Health tip: If you hold a can of beer in both hands, you can't touch your face. Anonymous

Beer Quotes Drinking

If you like water then you already like 70% of me. Anonymous

Short Quotes

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