A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.
Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else?
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
Retirement is when you stop living at work, and start working at living.
If I had 10 cookies and you took half, do you know what you would have? That's right, a black eye and a broken hand.
Studying means 10% reading and 90% complaining to your friends that you have to study.
You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you're full of energy and you can't wait to get to work? Me neither!
I'm a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.
My wife never gives up. She is so insistent that she entered the wrong password over and over again until she managed to convince the computer that she's right!
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face!
They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?
Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to.
Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job.
Me: For the first time in life, things seem to be getting better. :)
Life: LOL, give me a second!
Interviewer: So tell me about yourself. Me: I'd rather not.. I kinda want this job.
I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.
I'm slowly becoming an adult... please make it stop.
You know you're a mom when you understand why mama bear's porridge was cold.
If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won't feel like you are lonely any more.
Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy.
I didn't find out what happiness means until I got married... and then it was too late.
I only want one thing from fake people: distance.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
I love my computer because all my friends live inside it!
Cool Funny Quotes
CoolFunnyQuotes.com © 2020