Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors. - Anonymous
I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
My four moods: I'm too old for doing that. I'm too tired for doing that. I'm too sober for doing that. I don't have time for doing that. Anonymous
Time Quotes
Quantity is what you count, quality is what you count on. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Wise Quotes
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If you're all wrapped up in yourself then you are overdressed.
If you're all wrapped up in yourself then you are overdressed. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge? Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes
My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can't sleep. - Anonymous
My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can't sleep. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Sleep Quotes
Asleep first
Those who snore always fall asleep first. Anonymous
People Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. - Anonymous
What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. Anonymous
Questions
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect. - Anonymous
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect. Anonymous
Short Quotes
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' - Anonymous
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' Anonymous
Top 100 Witty Quotes
The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. - Anonymous
The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. Anonymous
People Quotes
Nutrition labels should include an "What if I ate the whole thing" section. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.
A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Life Quotes
The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready. - Anonymous
The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready. Anonymous
Short Quotes

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