Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

To make time fly, throw your watch out the window. - Anonymous
To make time fly, throw your watch out the window. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Time Quotes
My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I'm still at work. - Anonymous
My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I'm still at work. Anonymous
Work Quotes
God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face.
God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face. Anonymous
Life Quotes Top 100
Facebook needs three buttons, "Like", "Dislike" and "Stop being stupid." - Anonymous
Facebook needs three buttons, "Like", "Dislike" and "Stop being stupid." Anonymous
Facebook Short Quotes Top 100
If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me! - Anonymous
If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me! Anonymous
Facebook Life Quotes
Been there done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn. - Anonymous
Been there done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn. Anonymous
Sayings
What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" - CoolFunnyQuotes.com
What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" Anonymous
Animals Top 100
I'm a ninja! No you're not. Did you see that? See what? Exactly! - Anonymous
I'm a ninja! No you're not. Did you see that? See what? Exactly! Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
Me sarcastic? Never. - Anonymous
Me sarcastic? Never. Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale's mating call. - Anonymous
Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale's mating call. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money. - Anonymous
I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money. Anonymous
Money Quotes Short Quotes
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. - Anonymous
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep. - Anonymous
When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep. Anonymous
Sleep Quotes Statements Work Quotes
I eat cake because it's someone's birthday somewhere today. - Anonymous
I eat cake because it's someone's birthday somewhere today. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Short Quotes
It's almost bed time, so I'll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick. - Anonymous
It's almost bed time, so I'll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick. Anonymous
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