Top 100 Funny Quotes

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You know the potholes on a road are bad when they assign lifeguards to them, in case anybody falls inside. - Anonymous
You know the potholes on a road are bad when they assign lifeguards to them, in case anybody falls inside. Anonymous
Know Quotes Stupid Quotes
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' - Anonymous
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' Anonymous
Witty Quotes
People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important.
People say you can't live without love, but I think oxygen is more important. Anonymous
Love Quotes Marriage Quotes People Quotes
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How was the dog's day? Ruff. - Anonymous
How was the dog's day? Ruff. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Short Quotes
I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog.
I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Think Quotes
I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking. - Anonymous
I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking. Anonymous
Drinking Stupid Quotes Think Quotes
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend.
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even better with a friend. Anonymous
Exercise Quotes Friend Quotes Sayings
There's something missing in my life, I just don't know if it's a puppy, a person, or a slice of pizza. - Anonymous
There's something missing in my life, I just don't know if it's a puppy, a person, or a slice of pizza. Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes People Quotes
I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. - Anonymous
I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
All you have to know about celery is that it's made up of 95% water, and it's 100% not pizza. - Anonymous
All you have to know about celery is that it's made up of 95% water, and it's 100% not pizza. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Know Quotes Sayings
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. - Anonymous
Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year.
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Work Quotes
The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.
The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

Walter Bagehot

Life Quotes People Quotes Short Quotes
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