Anonymous Quote

I always try to cheer myself up by singing when I get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems.

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If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

Jack Handey

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The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. Lily Tomlin

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The only problem with golf is that the slow people are always in front of you and the fast people always end up behind you. Anonymous

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I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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Happiness: The emotion that puts your face in motion. Fear: The emotion that puts your legs in motion. Anger: The emotion that puts your fist in motion. Lesson: Don't be afraid or angry and you won't have to run and fight. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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I'm not frowning, I'm just smiling upside down. Anonymous

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Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge. Anonymous

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In grammar class the teacher asks her student: When you sing you say 'I sing' what do you say when your brother is singing? I say 'shut up you're a terrible singer'. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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Just because I can't sing doesn't mean that I won't sing. Anonymous

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A good mood like is like a balloon, one prick is all it takes to ruin it. Anonymous

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Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera. Anonymous

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To be a good hunter you need good eyes, a steady hand, and a loud voice so you can yell for help when you're in a tree top. Anonymous

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Smile today, tomorrow could be worse. Anonymous

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Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.

Art Buchwald

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Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I'm tired of solving them for you. Anonymous

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Stop worrying about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. Charles M. Schulz

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I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every minute of it. Anonymous

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When a door closes another door should open, but if it doesn't then go in through the window. Anonymous

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Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. Anonymous

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Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else? Anonymous

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My imaginary friend thinks he has problems. Anonymous

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