Top 100 Funny Quotes

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Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. - Anonymous
Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. Anonymous
People Quotes Short Quotes Statements
I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Anonymous
I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Love Quotes Short Quotes
That awkward moment you can't understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times. - Anonymous
That awkward moment you can't understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times. Anonymous
Moments Time Quotes
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Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double. - Anonymous
Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double. Anonymous
Beer Quotes Drinking Short Quotes
I always give 100% at work! 12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday and 5% on Friday. Welcome back weekend. - Anonymous
I always give 100% at work! 12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday and 5% on Friday. Welcome back weekend. Anonymous
Work Quotes
Three monkeys escaped from the zoo, one was caught watching TV, the other playing hockey, and the third one was caught reading this quote! - Anonymous
Three monkeys escaped from the zoo, one was caught watching TV, the other playing hockey, and the third one was caught reading this quote! Anonymous
Animals TV Quotes Witty Quotes
Sleeping is hard in the summer because the blankets are too warm, but without them I am vulnerable to monsters. - Anonymous
Sleeping is hard in the summer because the blankets are too warm, but without them I am vulnerable to monsters. Anonymous
Sayings Sleep Quotes
I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. - Anonymous
I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. Anonymous
Life Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Friends are like rainbows, always there to cheer you up after a storm. - Anonymous
Friends are like rainbows, always there to cheer you up after a storm. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes
A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have. - Anonymous
A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. - Anonymous
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. Anonymous
Life Quotes Questions Short Quotes
I changed my password everywhere to 'incorrect.'
I changed my password everywhere to 'incorrect.' That way when I forget it, it always reminds me, 'Your password is incorrect.' Anonymous
Computers
If you have crazy friends you have everything you'll ever need. - Anonymous
If you have crazy friends you have everything you'll ever need. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes
My best friends are like fairy tales, they've been there since once upon a time and will be there until forever after. - Anonymous
My best friends are like fairy tales, they've been there since once upon a time and will be there until forever after. Anonymous
Friend Quotes
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