Top 100 Funny Quotes
If a philosopher answers your question, you will no longer understand what you asked in the first place.
Anonymous
It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already.
Anonymous
Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
Anonymous
Instead of calling it the John I'm going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.
Anonymous
I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.
Anonymous
They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?
Anonymous
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep.
Anonymous
Displayed 136-150 of 400 quotes.