Top 100 Funny Quotes

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A relationship without trust is like a cell phone with no service, all you can do is play games. - Anonymous
A relationship without trust is like a cell phone with no service, all you can do is play games. Anonymous
Analogies Love Quotes Phone
I would like to apologize to anyone whom I haven't offended yet. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly. - Anonymous
I would like to apologize to anyone whom I haven't offended yet. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly. Anonymous
Stupid Quotes
It's funny how nobody notices all the good things you do until you don't do them. - Anonymous
It's funny how nobody notices all the good things you do until you don't do them. Anonymous
Sayings Work Quotes
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Whenever I'm sad, you're there. Whenever I have problems, you're there. Whenever I lose control, you're there. Let's face it, you are bad luck. - Anonymous
Whenever I'm sad, you're there. Whenever I have problems, you're there. Whenever I lose control, you're there. Let's face it, you are bad luck. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful. - Anonymous
I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Life Quotes Sleep Quotes
I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten. - Anonymous
I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten. Anonymous
Life Quotes Time Quotes
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again. - Anonymous
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again. Anonymous
Know Quotes Love Quotes Short Quotes
I love my job only when I'm on vacation.
I love my job only when I'm on vacation. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Lazy Quotes Love Quotes Sayings
The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' - Anonymous
The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' Anonymous
Funny Tree Quotes Stupid Quotes Witty Quotes
The best revenge is massive success.
The best revenge is massive success.

Frank Sinatra

Short Quotes Wise Quotes
You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.
You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.

Rita Rudner

Know Quotes Questions Think Quotes
I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable. - Anonymous
I love that cute thing you do when you stop texting me for hours, it's adorable. Anonymous
People Quotes Phone Statements
Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong.
Fart when someone hugs you, it makes them feel strong. Anonymous
Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor.
I feel sorry for people who don't have dogs. I hear they have to pick up food they drop on the floor. Anonymous
Animals Dog Quotes Eat Quotes
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