According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings.
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?
When is yelling during a robbery a bad idea? When you have gold teeth.
You know the speed of light; so what is the speed of dark?
Why do dentists use more anesthetic for longer procedures? So you won't be able to run away when it's time to pay the bill.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'
What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?
When is the longer way always better than the shorter one? When you're a taxi driver.
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
Who are you and how did you get in here? Frank: I'm a locksmith. And... I'm a locksmith...
Naked Gun (Movie)
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