What did my doctor tell me when I rushed into his office and told him I have 40 seconds to live? Hold on a minute!
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. Henny Youngman
But doctor, where is the umbilical cord? New technology, it's wireless. Anonymous
Why do dentists use more anesthetic for longer procedures? So you won't be able to run away when it's time to pay the bill. Anonymous
What's the best thing about living in Switzerland? The flag is a big plus. Anonymous
Yes officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn't see your car. Anonymous
I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong. Charles M. Schulz