In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep.
Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday.
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.
Sorry I didn't pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone.
The richer you get, the more expensive happiness becomes.
I'm on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.
I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.
Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account.
At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up.
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
God please give me patience, if you give me strength I will just punch them in the face.
I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal.
Life status: Currently holding it all together with one bobby pin.
I love everyone! I love to be around some people, I love to stay away from others, and some I'd just love to punch right in the face!
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.
If life is not smiling at you, give it a good tickling.
Dance like nobody is watching, because they are not, they are all checking their phones.
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