I don't mean to interrupt people, I just randomly remember things and get really excited.
Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep.
I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.
I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.
The surest sign that there's intelligent life elsewhere in the universe, is that it has never contacted us.
Life is always rocky when you're a gem.
That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another....
A day without coffee is like something without something.
If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook.
Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.
Life is too short to remove USB safely.
I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes.
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wish bone, a back bone, and a funny bone.
There's something missing in my life, I just don't know if it's a puppy, a person, or a slice of pizza.
I have a new hair style today, it's called "I tried."
Dear life, I understand very clearly that you are not fair so you can stop teaching me that lesson.
Please cancel my subscription to your issues.
I think something's missing in my life... Like... 2-3 million dollars.
I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games.
Smiles are contagious... be a carrier.
You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new cleaning sponge at the kitchen sink.
Make yourself at home... clean my kitchen.
I need a timeout. Send me to the beach and don't let me come back until I change my attitude.
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