Life Quotes

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If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me! - Anonymous

If I don't log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must've kidnapped me! Anonymous

Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them? - Anonymous

Why must I prove that I am me when I pay bills over the phone? Did some else call to pay my bills, and if they did, why don't you let them? Anonymous

Money Quotes Phone Top 100

Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control.

Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Short Quotes TV Quotes

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

Simpsons

Lazy Quotes Top 100 Work Quotes

I have a new hair style today, it's called "I tried." - Anonymous

I have a new hair style today, it's called "I tried." Anonymous

Sayings Short Quotes

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here. - Anonymous

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here. Anonymous

Stupid Quotes Top 100

Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account.

Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account. Anonymous

Facebook Time Quotes Top 100

Life always offers you a second chance. It's called tomorrow.

Life always offers you a second chance. It's called tomorrow. Anonymous

Short Quotes Top 100

Me: What a terrible day. Mom: Be more positive! Me: What a beautiful terrible day. - Anonymous

Me: What a terrible day. Mom: Be more positive! Me: What a beautiful terrible day. Anonymous

What type of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly squats. - Anonymous

What type of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly squats. Anonymous

Exercise Quotes Lazy Quotes People Quotes

You already know something you don't even know that you know.

You already know something you don't even know that you know.

Dr. Milton Erickson

Know Quotes Short Quotes

Stop worrying about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.

Stop worrying about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. Charles M. Schulz

Short Quotes Top 100 World Quotes

I'm slowly becoming an adult... please make it stop. - Anonymous

I'm slowly becoming an adult... please make it stop. Anonymous

When life closes a door, just open it again. It's a door, that's how they work. - Anonymous

When life closes a door, just open it again. It's a door, that's how they work. Anonymous

I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games.

I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games. Anonymous

I need a timeout. Send me to the beach and don't let me come back until I change my attitude. - Anonymous

I need a timeout. Send me to the beach and don't let me come back until I change my attitude. Anonymous

If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one life vest... I would miss you so much.

If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one life vest... I would miss you so much. Anonymous

People Quotes Top 100 Witty Quotes

I don't mean to interrupt people, I just randomly remember things and get really excited. - Anonymous

I don't mean to interrupt people, I just randomly remember things and get really excited. Anonymous

I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. - Anonymous

I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. Anonymous

Know Quotes Work Quotes

The hardest thing to find in life is happiness.

The hardest thing to find in life is happiness - money is only hard to find because it gets wasted trying to find happiness. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Happy Quotes Money Quotes Top 100

I know my limits. I don't always obey them, but I know them. - Anonymous

I know my limits. I don't always obey them, but I know them. Anonymous

Know Quotes Short Quotes Top 100

I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch. Anonymous

Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got. - Art Buchwald

Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.

Art Buchwald

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely! - Anonymous

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely! Anonymous

Short Quotes Think Quotes

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