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If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. - Anonymous

If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook.

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If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter. - John Gotti

If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.

John Gotti

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In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Woody Allen

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Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. - Anonymous

Tell your boss what you really think about him, and the truth shall set you free, from your job. Anonymous

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Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day!

Got to work this morning and my boss told me 'have a good day', so I went home and had a great day! Anonymous

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When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. - Anonymous

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. Anonymous

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When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! - Anonymous

When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! Anonymous

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My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot. - Anonymous

My boss asked me where I see myself in 5 years. I told him if his hair keeps falling out, I'll see myself in his bald spot. Anonymous

There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link. - Anonymous

There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link. Anonymous

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Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion.

Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion. Anonymous

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I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status.

I'm sorry that I'm not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse. Anonymous

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There are more important things in life than Facebook and Twitter,.. like watching TV, and having a beer. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account.

Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account. Anonymous

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I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status.

I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status. Anonymous

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My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. - Anonymous

My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Anonymous

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If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won't feel like you are lonely any more. - Anonymous

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won't feel like you are lonely any more. Anonymous

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It's like Facebook in real life. - Anonymous

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It's like Facebook in real life. Anonymous

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Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. - Anonymous

Dear life, when I said "can this day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. Anonymous

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When life closes a door, just open it again. It's a door, that's how they work. - Anonymous

When life closes a door, just open it again. It's a door, that's how they work. Anonymous

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My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary. - Anonymous

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary. Anonymous

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